FebulousFebruary 2025: Lost and Found

Day twenty

I follow the path

and pause to smell the lilacs,

recalling childhood.

But next day they have vanished:

two men are wielding chainsaws.

Andrew Derbyshire, Southend-on-Sea

Day nineteen

On the first day of school she sat next to me. 

Ginger hair and freckles. 

Beautiful. 

I fell in love. 

In my dreams she was me and I was she.

Wi laughed and gangboled together 

About nothing. 

Together. 

A force. 

Wi nuh see colour.

Wi loved each other x

Jo Fraser, Kent

Day eighteen

To my childhood self 

Mini-Me was sad and very confused 

I didn’t fit in and so 

was abused 

I wasn’t the same, so I 

wasn’t tolerated 

I was threatened, picked on 

and isolated 

I didn’t want a boyfriend and 

disliked cosmetics 

I didn’t understand so I tried 

apologetics 

School bullying and 

beatings became more frequent 

I had a nervous breakdown 

and needed treatment 

I left school and I 

never returned 

My education suffered, my 

parents were concerned 

They found me a doctor 

who helped with my stress 

He suggested college to 

sort out this mess 

The college kids were nice 

and much more mature 

Whilst there, I found politics 

which helped for sure 

I learned about fighting for 

campaigns and causes 

Such as CND, and Gay 

rights with legal clauses 

As I matured, I was glad to 

be Gay 

Indeed, I can’t imagine my 

life, any other way. 

By Jenny King February, 2024

Day seventeen

To my childhood self. 

You are very clever but that won’t save you in a world where 

you are made to feel stupid. 

You are very handsome but that won’t save you in a world 

where you need to look pretty. 

You have a lovely voice but that won’t save you in a world 

full of silence. 

You were not made to fit – you were made to stand out. 

One day you will realise just how wonderful it is to be a 

clever, handsome singer. 

And you will encourage others to take a stand and be out. 

Be brave. You will save yourself. 

Therapy is just around the corner. 

Fisch 

London

Day sixteen

This is not how it will 

alwavs be

This is NOT normal

You are not a worthless 

piece of shit

It will take time

It will take love

It will take coming to terms

It will never go away

You will come to an 

understanding with 

yourself

And love yourself 

And love others 

And be loved

I swear to me that this is 

the truth

The whole truth

And nothing but the truth

Chrissie Snell

Swansea

Day fifteen

TO MY YOUNG SELF

I am the keeper of our memories

I am the bearer of our flame

And the author of our wrongdoing

I am the blameless and to blame

I am the survivor of our history

Of our triumphs and our plight

I wear the badge of hard-won freedoms

And the scars of the long fight

Forgive us in youth

Forgive them in age

Hold fast to your righteous anger

Let go of your rage

Tread lightly

We are almost there

Brook Hobbins, Kent

Day fourteen

Can we drown the wave dreams now please?

When the wave comes

And you run,

sister scooped by mum

Dad carries the stuff

And lonely you

Run

Those three year old legs

Won!

Ta for that!

Harriet McDonald

Whitstable 

Day thirteen

Things that should have been said

You have extraordinary hair. The colour, blue-black. Unusual and beautiful.

You are clever, sharp minded, quick witted.

Whatever you become is just fine – rocket scientist, factory worker – so long as you are happy is

what matters.

Well done!

You make us proud.

This is what kindness actually looks like.

Things that should not have been said

Why can’t you be…..

Lel, Scarborough

Day twelve

Hats

Lesbians and teenage boys

You wear it well

Turned back and turned up

Security camera disguised

Or gang member badge so you know I’m cool enough to know I’m not cool enough at 50 

to share a rebellious moment or team logo 

worn in pride at the win one goal more or one goal more achievements 

while we still had the legs for it in weekends 

fitting in with the gang at last.

Janet Jones  

Brighton

Day eleven

Boy be you 

Be the curly floppy hair and big boots 

Be the hidden 

Inside porkpie hats. 

Be the barricade of smoke 

of the red and white box. 

Hide for this while to keep 

you safe 

You can’t say all the 

words yet 

But out will come Someday soon. 

Boy treat your woes with 

dreams of what could be 

Channel the worry down 

a tunnel 

Holding on until the end 

You won’t waste time 

You won’t like it for a while 

But boy the light will 

heal you 

As the big boots step out 

into the light and swap for 

heels. 

As the flopping curly hair is 

ready for bleaching sprayed 

with glitter. 

As the smoky barricades 

become fresh air to breath 

and make you live. 

Boy be more gentle for now 

you will get there 

Boy keep safer than you 

have been. 

Hold tight.

Adam Haylock-Lott

Kent