FebulousFebruary 2026: The Old Photograph

Unlearning

I see her.

Standing still.

Doing her best to be what’s expected.

She’s dressed up.

Looked at.

Measured.

Smiled at for getting it right.

Now inside…

something tightens.

Not because anything was wrong

but because she learns, right there,

that being seen means being judged.

That approval, lives out there, not in here.

The moment doesn’t break her.

It trains her. The programming begins.

She learns to watch herself.

To behave.

To perform.

To check whether she’s enough

before ever asking how she feels.

So learns to listen outward.

To cues.

To rules.

To expectations.

Her body, wise, responsive, loyal,

does what bodies do.

It adapts.

It learns when to stay quiet.

When to push on.

When to smile instead of speak.

It doesn’t forget, it’s just paying attention.

Now I look at her again.

I don’t want to fix her, or rescue her,

or tell her she should have known better.

I want to sit beside her

and say:

You didn’t lose your wisdom.

You learned to prioritise

someone else’s agenda.

We don’t need to fight anything.

We don’t need to unlearn with force.

We just change the conditions.

We listen inward.

We soften.

We trust the signals

that were always there.

This isn’t about becoming someone new.

It’s about coming back.

Now, 

this time,

she gets to lead.

Emma.